Elsa

On the demise of the Julio-Claudian dynasty...

I shall put on my geeky classicist hat to relay this tale. Chris Martin, if you are reading this somehow, I'm certain you'll enjoy it (or perhaps, be disgusted by it).

I wake up each morning to the radio - Q107 Classic Rock to be specific (no Coldplay, unfortunately, sorry Chris). At 6:30 AM they play a little trivia game called "Stump the Chump". Granted I am barely awake or functioning at the time it comes on so I normally snooze through it but today was a little different. One of the questions was "Caligula and Nero were what?". I braced for the response. The challenger guessed 'colours'. I rolled my eyes while contemplating a new set of Crayola crayons in Caligula blood red and Nero luscious lilac. Add in Tiberius ice blue, Augustus military beige and Claudius earth green and you've got a full Julio-Claudian set. Even more laughable though was the response of the Q107 'expert'.

DJ: Caligula...that has something to do with sex?
(Lady Croft ponders this *grins* -  Most definitely, at least from my personal perspective,  but I really don't think that is the answer they are going for here)
DJ: They made sex films
(Lady Croft ponders this - well, no, but I think they would both find that comment highly complimentary. In fact it's quite likely that they both would in fact be producing, directing and starring in sex films if they were alive today *Julio-Claudian emperor fangirl lust*  Caligula would be more Gibson-esque with blood and gore, while Nero would be all for a delightful soft core gay porn musical ) you know I will be thinking about this all day..the casting alone would be AMAZING!!!

So basically here we have two relatively intelligent people who haven't got a clue who the third and fifth Roman emperors are. For shame. This is the state that the world has come to. On second thought, perhaps that 'relatively intelligent' designation I just assigned is not applicable in this particular instance. After all, they were both asked which peninsula was located off of Spain and Portugal and were given  the choice of the Siberian, Liberian or Iberian - neither contestant was able to select the correct answer. *headdesk* 

Lord what I wouldn't give for just one half-decent ATP or futbol player who can actually recite The Aeneid in Latin (or one that even knows what The Aeneid is, for that matter) *prays*
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Fernando Gago would probably know it!
Oh, and an old favourite of mine...a Basque boy who retired from Athletic Bilbao a year or so ago. His name is Ismael Urzaiz. I saw a little bio on him on GOLTV's 'Futbol Mundial' some time ago. It was fascinating. He collects art and has his own clothing store. There must be a few more intelligent footballers out there with creative interests. Oh, yes. I know that Fabian Assmann, goalkeeper for Independiente in Argentina was studying to be a doctor before making his career in futbol. Also Esteban Granero of Getafe in Spain is studying at University while playing futbol and has been the butt of much teasing from his teammates.
Lord what I wouldn't give for just one half-decent ATP or futbol player who can actually recite The Aeneid in Latin (or one that even knows what The Aeneid is, for that matter) *prays*

Not even if Hell froze over because let's face it jocks and intelligence just don't mix as much as we'd wish it were so...well at least not jocks of the MALE persuasion...not even my beloved Feliciano Lopez and ya not even your Gago...metrosexuals they may be but scholars they are NOT! *hangs head*...can they even spell Aeneid?
Actually I do believe they all know a little Latin without even realizing it - think of all the 'correct' terms for the various sexual positions. They are all in Latin.If they don't already know the formal Latin terms, I'm certain a simple demonstration will suffice and these words will forever be engraved in their minds. I'm completely available for said purpose...of course, such tutoring skills are only available to the select few who are highly motivated and up to the challenge, so to speak.